Dear Da Vinci Robot,
Can I call you Leo? Is that ok? I just wanted to say thank you. You’re the best thing that’s happened to medicine since a scientist stumbled upon that fungus that kills bacteria. Who ever made you deserves the Nobel Prize. You operated on me once about 5 years ago. I had no idea who you were, I actually saw the surgeon who used you due to his reputation for having skilled hands, (and because he accepted my insurance ;-) ). But when they rolled me in to the operating theater and he told me you would be the one removing my gallbladder what glee I experienced!!! JOY unspeakable!!!. (Never mind the fact that the surgery didn’t fix my underlying issue, that’s irrelevant).
I see you on billboards, what a visage of miraculous medical technology you are. The answer to all of life’s woes lies in your pincer like grip. Knowing you are there in case my patients need you, it really takes the bite out of the fact that my exam rooms could use some renovating, and that more basic supplies I need for my office are ‘not in the budget’. Blessed assurance Da Vinci is mine.... So when I lose ancillary staff, I will be at peace, for thou art with me, thy laparoscope and trochar doth comfort me. Since you take medicaid is there any way you can add psychiatric services to your many skills? That would be incredibly epically awesome. You cost seven figures, but I’ll accept the powers that be refusing to adjust staff salaries as long as you are here to cut, cauterized and staple together all of my problems. Either way...Keep doing what you do Leo, and maybe just maybe...everything will be alright.
Sincerely,
PeteyHattrick MD
